Here is a recent family photo! Everyone seems so happy, loving, etc....right! If only it was always the case...but life isn't "picture" perfect! 
So here's the deal....I'm kind of like an only child in the fact that my brother is 12 years older than me and my younger brothers are 7 years younger. We really weren't close enough on either end to have any type of sibling rivalry, kick down dirty fights, or problem's using each other stuff. Maybe my parents were on to something? Anyway, so as I try to understand my kids and their relationships with one another, I'm constantly bewildered at how they treat each other with such kindness and love one minute and then with such disgust another. Is this normal? Is the term "sibling rivalry" a common one because it's just a fact of life? Anyone out there fight nonstop with their siblings as children and drive their parents crazy? Ben said he did, but I need more proof! How about your kids? I've gotta know! I'm just wondering if I'm raising a bunch of hoodlums who are never going to grasp the term, "love your brother as yourself"!
What has spurred this outpouring of feelings onto the pages of this lovely blog!? Well here it goes.
Thursday night was supposed to be a great night with our friends the Lorenzana's. Our plans were a nice Ham dinner, movies, a gift exchange and some gingerbread cookie making! Sounds like a great night, huh? Something they should be so grateful for and on their best behavior for.....NO! NO! Before we even got there, the boys earned themselves 10 minutes of time out on their couch! Luckily the kids behaved themselves through dinner, gifts, the movie, etc. It was quite the enjoyable evening...the babies asleep upstairs and the kids and adults enjoying each others company! Then the Wii came out! Of course there was bickering about who was going to play, and complaining that it was their turn, etc.....then while the adults were getting ready to play a game in the kitchen, there was a huge blow out, that turned into Aubrie full on punching Boston in the face! REallY??? Who does that??? Kicking, pushing, hitting....I've seen that plenty of times, especially in my days of Nursery leader...put punching!
I hate when punishing my kids punishes me. But that's what I had to do! I packed up everything and told the kids we had to leave. Aubrie was screaming and freaking out, and Boston did his pitiful, sorrowful cry! When we got home I started taking Aubrie and Bostons presents out from under the tree, telling them I was going to give them to kids who deserved them. (The crazy Mom was totally surfacing!) Boston, being the sweet boy that he is, was whimpering saying, "Mom, please don't' take Aubrie's presents". Aubrie was in hysterics, screaming that her Christmas was being ruined, and was going to be the worst Christmas EVER!!! As I was packing the presents in the back of my trunk, she started to walk away from the house, pretending she was going to run away? We finally rallied everyone into our living room for a family council.
Ben was very good about doing this. I was so livid I just wanted to go lock myself in my room! Ben and I had a good talk about the meaning of Christmas, and how we needed to treat each other with love and respect. Ben gave the kids blessings, while Ethan tried to stay awake! I told the kids that I was going to mail their gifts to Santa, and on Christmas Eve would give him a call to tell him, A: To bring the gift back and put them under the tree, or B: Give their gifts to other children. I dropped them off at the Lorenzana's for "hiding" the next morning!
So....the results...They have been ANGELS these past two days.
Yesterday Boston was sick and Aubrie was taking care of him. Getting cold wash clothes for his head, making get well cards, etc. Today was the same....them trying hard to get along. These past two days have been so peaceful.....I'm just wondering how long it will last!
Oh wait, I take the two full days of peace back. I did have 20 minutes of panic yesterday. The kids (Aubrie and Ethan) asked if they could ride their bikes. After 10 minutes of not seeing or hearing them out front, I went looking for them. I couldn't find them on our street or neighboring streets. I thought they may have tried going the back way to the Lorenzana's. As I was pulling on our street, after I went looking for them the second time, I saw them scootering up to the house with get well cards for Boston and cookies in their hands! It was hard to be mad at them. We just had a good talk about the fact that not only do they have to be able to see our house from where they are at, but that I have to be able to see THEM from our house, too!
What has spurred this outpouring of feelings onto the pages of this lovely blog!? Well here it goes.
Thursday night was supposed to be a great night with our friends the Lorenzana's. Our plans were a nice Ham dinner, movies, a gift exchange and some gingerbread cookie making! Sounds like a great night, huh? Something they should be so grateful for and on their best behavior for.....NO! NO! Before we even got there, the boys earned themselves 10 minutes of time out on their couch! Luckily the kids behaved themselves through dinner, gifts, the movie, etc. It was quite the enjoyable evening...the babies asleep upstairs and the kids and adults enjoying each others company! Then the Wii came out! Of course there was bickering about who was going to play, and complaining that it was their turn, etc.....then while the adults were getting ready to play a game in the kitchen, there was a huge blow out, that turned into Aubrie full on punching Boston in the face! REallY??? Who does that??? Kicking, pushing, hitting....I've seen that plenty of times, especially in my days of Nursery leader...put punching!
I hate when punishing my kids punishes me. But that's what I had to do! I packed up everything and told the kids we had to leave. Aubrie was screaming and freaking out, and Boston did his pitiful, sorrowful cry! When we got home I started taking Aubrie and Bostons presents out from under the tree, telling them I was going to give them to kids who deserved them. (The crazy Mom was totally surfacing!) Boston, being the sweet boy that he is, was whimpering saying, "Mom, please don't' take Aubrie's presents". Aubrie was in hysterics, screaming that her Christmas was being ruined, and was going to be the worst Christmas EVER!!! As I was packing the presents in the back of my trunk, she started to walk away from the house, pretending she was going to run away? We finally rallied everyone into our living room for a family council.
Ben was very good about doing this. I was so livid I just wanted to go lock myself in my room! Ben and I had a good talk about the meaning of Christmas, and how we needed to treat each other with love and respect. Ben gave the kids blessings, while Ethan tried to stay awake! I told the kids that I was going to mail their gifts to Santa, and on Christmas Eve would give him a call to tell him, A: To bring the gift back and put them under the tree, or B: Give their gifts to other children. I dropped them off at the Lorenzana's for "hiding" the next morning!
So....the results...They have been ANGELS these past two days.
Yesterday Boston was sick and Aubrie was taking care of him. Getting cold wash clothes for his head, making get well cards, etc. Today was the same....them trying hard to get along. These past two days have been so peaceful.....I'm just wondering how long it will last!
Oh wait, I take the two full days of peace back. I did have 20 minutes of panic yesterday. The kids (Aubrie and Ethan) asked if they could ride their bikes. After 10 minutes of not seeing or hearing them out front, I went looking for them. I couldn't find them on our street or neighboring streets. I thought they may have tried going the back way to the Lorenzana's. As I was pulling on our street, after I went looking for them the second time, I saw them scootering up to the house with get well cards for Boston and cookies in their hands! It was hard to be mad at them. We just had a good talk about the fact that not only do they have to be able to see our house from where they are at, but that I have to be able to see THEM from our house, too!
4 comments:
So glad to know that your kids are normal. I was beginning to wonder. :) I used to fight like crazy with my brother, but we're great friends now. My kids go from being best friends to fist fights too. Even sweet little Regan. It's a part of life, and I'd be more worried if your kids NEVER fought. You guys are such great parents. Your kids are lucky to have you!
I love this post. I remember fighting with my siblings.. I have scars and nail prints to prove it too.
But as a Mom this week, I totally relate. I think Christmas or something is making it worse. Last Thursday and Friday brought, the kids helped me bring out my "crazy mom." The girls tantrums were unbelievable! I was like.. "are you kidding me?" I even called Austin the day of his final and tell that I didn't know what I was going to do!
Anyways, love the idea of giving the presents back to Santa and their options.
Thanks for sharing. We are not always "picture perfect," but sometimes! LOVE the family picture.. you guys look great!
OK, maybe I shouldn't tell you about this, but I remember my little sister chasing me around the house with a butcher knife once when my parents weren't home! YIKES!! We were really bad as kids, but today she is absolutely one of my BEST FRIENDS!! And yes, my kids fight ALL the time. I am looking forward to the day when they are as good of friends as my sisters and I are.
My siblings and I use to fight quite a bit. We would have moments where we were nice to each other and then we'd do something horrible like punch each other in the face. I never understood why it made my mom so sad until I had kids and they started to fight. All you want is for them to love each other. My siblings and I are all so close now as adults we hang out a lot and really love each other. We know we would do anything for each other. I think siblings help us learn. We learn social skills, conflict resolution, unconditional love, forgivness ect. Sometimes kids are mean to each other and take it too far, but as long as we as parents are here to guide them, they will do better in the future. From what I've seen you are a great mom and it's easy to feel the loving spirit that is in your home. The overall feeling is what really matters! I also think Christmas makes kids act kinda insane. There is so much excited energy inside them that they do even crazier things than usual. I asked Brody why he was acting so crazy the other day and he said that he thought maybe he had eaten a cracky-cane instead of a candy- cane! Weirdo!
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