Friday, January 29, 2010

Mean Girls!!!

I've never understood why girls are mean! Guys just get in a fight, and then they move on and forget about it 30 seconds later. Girls backbite, gossip, and group together always leaving someone out. Growing up, I tried removing myself from that Drama as much as possible. I always had a handful of really good friends, and the rest of my best friends were guys. That's pretty much how I lived my life, until I got married, of course. Guys were easy. I never had to worry about whether they were talking to the other guys behind my back when I left. I never had to worry that they were going to try to "one up" me in everything, and I never had to worry that they were going to like the same person I did, and get all offended and jealous if they liked me back! My girlfriends have pretty much been the same as me. I have had a few here and there that are awfully competitive, but besides that, I try to keep my distance from anything drama related. That's required me to pull out of some friendships, some groups of girls, and even some family relationships for awhile. But I have to say that though its not always easy, it'sdefinitely worth not surrounding yourself by the negative spirit that comes with it. Nothing is worth the withdrawal of the spirit. Especially being popular or liked. What does that really matter in the end? NOTHING!

Now, how do I successfully help my sweet daughter to understand all this? Poor Aubrie had the worst week this week. She was waking up ready for a fight, every morning. Of course, she has always been strong willed (a trait that will do her good when she is older), but as her Mother I could tell something was off. Then Thursday she comes home upset telling me how a girl in her new Math class is heckling her. This girl is friends with one of her best friends. She just moved in, and Aubrie said she has been mean to her from the beginning. I'm no fool here. It's so apparent that this girl feel threatened by Aubrie's friendship with the other girl, and so she is trying to bully and embarrass her. Now Aubrie feels hurt that her friend didn't stick up for her. Her other friends were supportive when they saw Aubrie's eyes full of tears as she came back from Math. Aubrie emailed her friend and asked why she didn't stick up for her.
Ben and I assured Aubrie that jealousy was involved, and that the rude remarks were further from the truth. We even practiced the next day how to respond to heckling. I threw out every type of hurtful thing and she had to respond with "So". She started to find it funny. I also had to go over the whole, "do you even care to be their friend. Of course not, so who cares what they think?"

Friday the protective Mom instinct in me came out, and I decided to make a stop at the school for lunch. I brought a dozen Paradise cookies for her and her friends, and bought her some fun erasers she had been wanting. When I got to the lunch room the two girls saw me, and the bully would not make eye contact with me once the other girl whispered to her who I was. The one that has been Aubrie's friend came up and made all nice to me and Aubrie, and tried to sit with us, but the bully was whispering and shaking her head to sit at the other end. Did I really need to go? I don't know! But it made Aubrie's day to feel special as she was passing out cookies to her friends, and the girls definitely got the message that her Mom knows whats going on and isn't happy about it! (Did I mention that I gave her the stink eye!?) Is that bad?! LOL Aubrie has had many of conflicts with friends, but no one bully's my kids around and gets away with it!

"Sick" Snow trip

So after all the record breaking snow Flagstaff got, we decided it was time to sift through our snow gear, fill in the gaps (which luckily was only a pair of boots for Aubrie), and head up North! Sophia was so excited trying all her snow gear on. We were sure she was going to have a blast. The drive up North was amazing! I have never seen that much snow that south of Flagstaff. The trees looked like they could snap, the snow on them was so thick. I think it was the first time the kids ever chose looking out the window over their DS's!

When we got to the exit, that takes us to the awesome spot we discovered last time (by accident), we found that the road hadn't been cleared yet. There were several families sledding right there at the exit. It looked good enough for the kids to have fun, and it minimized our walking, so we decided to park and sled there. The kids had fun. Aubrie and Boston did the sledding boards. Boston was getting the hang of it pretty fast. Usually Aubrie and I are the only ones brave enough to try it out.


Ethan had fun sledding, and eventually started collecting huge snow balls and rolling them all to one spot. After about 15 minutes of doing that, we realized he was building a fort. That boy is always creating something! All of us got in on the action, and that ended up being the funniest thing on every one's list.

On the way home we stopped at Johnny Rockets at the Casino. This time they are a bit older and more aware. They had tonz of questions about the slot machines, and then Aubrie kept asking me, "Do you think that guy gambles?" LOL The kids had fun, and we actually got Aubrie and Boston to get up and dance again, when the employees did their dance. One of the servers saw Aubrie, and came over and tried to teach her the dance. It was pretty funny. I think Boston was glad he sat down before she caught him in the act, too! We left after lunch, and skipped bowling this time. Sophia was sick, poor thing.
She was acting tired in the morning, and she was complaining and falling asleep when we went sledding. That surprised us because she was so excited to go the night before. When we got to Johnny Rockets I felt her head and she had a fever. Poor thing:( She ended up having a fever through Wednesday. She just sat around the house, not having much energy for anything, and not eating much of anything. Last night our snow pictures were cycling on the TV and she said, "I was sick at the snow", in a sad voice. Guess we need to go again! I'm up for it. It was a great family fun! (and we need to get more use out of those snow clothes!)

Thursday, January 21, 2010

A Part of Me!

Two posts in the afternoon....it's raining today! When it rains in Phoenix it's like a blizzard or something.....anyway.....

Last night I received a text from an old high school friend. He told me that he had finally found one of our old friends, we had been looking for on Facebook for almost a year now. I was so excited, and jumped on Facebook to add him. My friend and I started searching for his sister, and other friends that we have been unable to find from our church group growing up. When we find everyone, we want to have a reunion. It really got me thinking about how funny it was that we were so excited to find this one person, that I hadn't thought about for years! It really got me thinking about friendships and how they effect us. It's almost like every friend takes a part of you with them, and when you find them it's like finding that part of yourself that has been missing.
When I think of each of my friends it really is true. Each friend brings out a different part of me. One may bring out my silliness, someone else my spiritual side, another a more serving side. Different friends also help you realize different talents and qualities you have. Also, different emotions and feelings are brought out with each one. Memories and feelings associated with those memories are reproduced. How incredible is that?! Whether they are bad, or good, they are there.
This friend of ours is one that definitely kept us rolling, and brings back fun times in my teenage years. I'm so grateful for all my friends, past and present. I'm grateful for those who have been constant and supportive, those who can call me when I haven't spoken to them in years, and it's like we just spoke yesterday, and those who I hardly talk to, but know they love me and would be there for me in a second if I needed them. Even those friends where experiences weren't so pleasant, feelings of love and longing are still there, as I appreciate them for the things they taught me! All my hairstylists, thank you for your friendship whether you wanted it our not! Facebook....I appreciate you! So many lost friends found because of you! With that I would like to sign off with one of my favorite quotes about friends.... here's to all my friends!

"Each friend represents a work in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born. ----Anais Nin

(Erin, thanks my dear friend for giving me your quote book many years ago, that contained this gem!)

I Love Church Ball!

I'm sure your not believing it, or thinking that Ben must be posting this time. Nope. I really do like it. Ben gets a chance to hang out with friends, exercise, and do something he loves, while I get to work on my things or spend time with Aubrie. My best times with her are late at night as we talk and scratch backs! It's a time where she seems to let her guard down completely and opens up about everything. While most people that know her would think she is already open, there is a lot that comes out of her late at night. I LOVE it!

Yesterday, while at Target, I noticed Aubrie's bedding was 20 dollars off. That meant she only had 6 dollars to go. When I told her, she was elated and willing to do just about any chore, or rub anybody's feet to get the money. She asked me if she could rub my feet while Dad was at Basketball. She talked so much during it all, it ended up being over an hour of foot, leg, arm, and hand rubbing. That must be why men's rubs are so short....they don't talk enough! LOL Aubrie went on and on about stories her teacher shared with her, books she has read, things that happened at school, etc. Funny how when you ask your kids, when the get home from school, how it went, they answer, "Fine", and they don't share anything. Then the flood gates open late at night! Aubrie definitely earned her 6 dollars! I brought the bedding out of the car today, and will have her pay me for it. We'll see if I make her pay me for the pillows I bought to match!:)

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

So much for my Calendar!

OK...this weekend I was not a candidate for the "Mother of the Week" award and ate some humble pie. While I often pride myself on being organized and having everything on my calendar, I definitely messed up and my kids weren't happy about it. Saturday we spent the morning just hanging out and watching A Walk To Remember ( a great movie if you haven't seen it). Then we had a big breakfast, did our chores, and then got ready for our soccer games that started at 11:15. As we drove up to the soccer fields. we saw Aubrie's team playing. We were there 20 minutes early! I had no clue what was going on, but let Aubrie out as we parked. Once we parked and walked up to the fields, there was Aubrie, crying and saying that the game was almost over. Somehow I messed up, both of their games. So here were with two kids all dressed and excited to play and we had to just turn around and go back home. I thought I was so scheduled and organized. So much for that! Luckily the kids got over it fast! When I was at the temple Friday and was asking for more humility, I didn't' realize that he was going to work so fast! LOL Actually, that's not what I was asking for, but everyone can definitely use some humble pie once in awhile!
Saturday night Ben spent in the tent with the three older kids. He only lasted till 1:00, when the air mattress deflated and left him on the cold ground. He pulled all the kids out, and put them in their beds, while I was fast asleep upstairs. I had gone to bed extra early. I have been feeling very tired this past week. I have these spells every couple of months. They are hard on me, because I like to keep busy, but they also make me appreciate my heath when I have it!
Ben finally took the tent down yesterday, when it started raining. It was a sad day for Sophia. She loved going out to the "temple" (that's what she called) and play! Ben is such a great Dad for doing such fun things for the kids.
Here are some pictures I haven't gotten around to posting.
My Dad's last day here:( How I miss him! We had such a great time! He is so great at giving advice in such a loving manner. He also has treated me like an equal, never making me feel like my thoughts and feelings were inferior to his. He has always been there to support me and love me. Never has he made me feel like I was a disappointment to him. He has held me up on a pedestal, and I attribute a lot of my self image and self esteem to him always building me up. I think because of that, I have never wanted to let him down. Talk about good psychological parenting!
Last week we had 80's exercise night for mutual. Funny thing, is that I raided Aubrie's closet to get stuff. I never thought in a million years that my daughter would be wearing fluorescent, and stretch pants, but she is...and I LOVE it! While many people say the 80's were atrocious, I can not agree. I LOVE the 80's! While I personally wouldn't wear most of that stuff, it looks so cute on the little one's.

Brother play time! Had to take a picture so I could remember that they do have moments of playing so well together! (BTW, the book on the table is one of my new favorites for the kids!)

More creations by Ethan!
Guess he was jealous of all the snow Flagstaff was getting!
Glad the Jenga is getting used!

Bedding Worth Working For

While I'm often guilty of giving my children too much, sometimes I hold back dying desires to spoil, spoil, spoil, and make then earn things for themselves. Last year Aubrie spent countless hours doing laundry, chores, etc, and saving every dime of her allowance to earn enough money for a DS. Now this is what she is working hard for. Last week we were walking in Target and she found this bedding. She pleaded and begged, but I told her she would have to buy it herself. I told her her bedding was in perfect condition and it would not be smart for Mom and Dad to spend our money on something that wasn't needed. She complained that she never picked out her current bedding and that is was to juvenile for her. (It was a valid argument since she had no say in her room, but she wasn't complaining either when I got it all). None the less, I told her she would have to earn money if she wanted it. Since then, that's all she has been thinking about. She keeps looking at it online, making sure it's still there. In the meantime, she has had two lemonade stands to earn money. Saturday she sat out for 2 1/2 hours (as soon as she got home from soccer) and she earned 36 dollars. I was quite surprised that she had earned so much! That was after paying us for the lemonade and cups and giving a dollar to Ethan. Monday wasn't as successful. It was rainy and there wasn't as much traffic. I was proud of her that she didn't throw in the towel immediately. After splitting it with Ethan, she ended up with 2 dollars. Her response when I said sorry it didn't work out so well.. "That's OK, something is better than nothing". She is looking forward to another successful Saturday.

Here is my little secret. We already have purchased her bedding. We are keeping it hidden, so when she gets the money we will already have it for her! There has been several days that I have wanted to take it out of Ben's trunk and put it on her bed, and surprise her. I start rationalizing and saying, "she had earned so much already", or "she deserves it because she is doing so well at staying on top of her grades and all her other responsibilities", etc, etc. I then come to my senses, remembering that this experience is good for her, and will help her when she is older.
This makes me think of our Heavenly Father. I'm sure he wants to give us everything we want because he loves us and loves to see us happy. But he is wise and realizes that somethings we must wait for, because it teaches us patience, and we will also appreciate things more that we work hard for. Now if I can only remember that when I'm praying to him saying, "Why can't I have this now!" LOL
Here is to my sweet daughter who will remember when she worked hard for her bedding each time she gets in it, and a Mother who will learn that teaching your child the value of hard work is more rewarding than giving them everything!

Free time= Quality time

Last week I spent organizing and cleaning. I never got out of my work out clothes the beginning of the week. After the Holiday's, it always seems like the first weeks I spend getting the house back in order. Then, once that's accomplished, I walk around feeling like I have forgotten to do something. It's because I have been so used to running around with my head cut off October thru the New Years. It's a weird feeling to have a list that isn't as full with "must-do's" as there is "would--like -to-do's". While I often complain when I have so much going on, I think in reality I do better with it. Now, what will I do with my few months of down time? Work on my goals for this year!

One of my goals is to spend more of my days giving one on one time with Sophia. So far it's included trips to the park, library, reading books, and doing Playdoh. I really am enjoying this time with her, and am beginning to appreciate her more and more each day. She is such a sweet little girl. While I do admit she is strong headed as a bull, she has a soft center. She actually reminds me so much of Boston. Lately one her cutest things include, insisting on reading books on her own. She likes me to be there with her, but she won't let me read them to her. If she doesn't already have them memorized she will make something up. They always start with "One time....". One morning, during scripture study, she started "fake reading" It started with "One time...." and then she started making stuff up about Jesus and Heavenly Father as she looked at the Book of Mormon upside down! When it came to her in the circle, we would just let her fake read, and then the next person would pick up where we left off. Another thing that is so cute about her, is her manners. Though she is strongly opinionated, she is always sure to say her yes pleases and thank yous! What a sweetheart! Each new thing we do together helps me appreciate how lucky I am to have her all to myself, for such a long period each day. I've realized that my time with her will be short, and that there will always be time, later, spent out with friends, running meaningless errands, or working on projects that just don't matter. These little spirits are on loan to me for just a short time and she is my last!

One of my other goals is to make more time at bedtime. While I have always been good at reading, praying, back scratching, and singing my original good night song with each kid, I always wanted to get through it all as fast as possible. I recently have slowed things down a bit, and learned to be silly and have fun with the kids at bedtime. Even a few extra minutes hugging on a kid, or hearing more about their day is worth much more than a few minutes of TV, or on the computer.
Another goal of both Ben and I, is to make one on one time with each kid. While its often hard to do that amongst crazy schedules, Ben and I are making a more concentrated effort. We decided to implement "Night's Up"! This is where one of the kids gets to stay up an extra hour with Mom and Dad doing something fun. Last week Boston picked playing Super Mario with Ben and I. Ethan did the same, after requesting that his night up could be with the whole family watching a movie! Aubrie's was spent having dinner at AH-SO, with Ben, after her dance class. I can already tell how much these "nights-up" mean to them, and wish we would have started them earlier.
So here's to a year with more quality time with the kiddos! I can already see the difference it is making!

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Cowboy Night

I had been thinking lately about spending more time with the family and making memories. I figured that shooting out Aubrie's teeth weren't the best kind of memories to make and so that I had better make others so that I was not type cast! I had the distinct impression to set up a tent in the back yard and have a little camping adventure in the backyard. Saturday morning I stopped by WalMart for the necessary provisions so that we could have a wonderful time together. The first thing we did was get in the hot tub. I love when we can all be together in the hot tub. There is always lots of fun and splashing going on and it is fun to watch how the children interact with each other. No one jumped in the pool this time. I also like the hot tub because it usually makes the kids tired and they sleep better! After the hot tub we went into the house and changed into our pajamas to get ready for a movie. We ended up watching Pirates of the Carribean: The Curse of the Black Pearl. The kids really enjoyed the movie. I let Sophia stay up late hoping that she would go to bed easier and sleep in longer. The movie ended around 11:00 p.m. Aubrie had passed out on the couch so I took her upstairs and put her in our bed. I know that she likes to sleep with Rachel. She was asking about sleeping in the tent with the boys, but I told her that it was cold and she rolled over and went right to sleep. Aubrie is a creature of comfort and likes to get a good nights sleep. The boys and I headed outside to get into the tent. There were two very nice and very warm sleeping bags. The boys got those and I covered myself with two blankets. I thought that would be warm enough, but I was a little chilly as the night wore on. The boys were both excited to be in the tent. Ethan said that he wanted to tell scary stories. I let him go first and he started to tell a story about a Dad who goes camping with his two sons. He starts to talk about a very mean and bad coyote that is lurking about. I stopped him and told him not to make the story too scary so that he did not scare himself. He looked up at me and said, "dad, don't worry. Only the Dad gets eaten!" Nice. I start to look around like something might just get me. The boys had a good laugh. I plugged a floor fan into an extension cord so that we could have white noise. The boys quickly drifted off to sleep. I lay there for a while. I started to feel something pawing at my foot through the tent. I thought at first that it was one of the cats. It was pretty strong. I then thought that it was Rachel, but Rachel later assured me that she did not come outside for fear of waking us up. Maybe it was the coyote Ethan had warned me of! Good thing that I had the door all zipped up!
In the middle of the night I could feel some of the air going out of the air mattress. By morning time I was completely on the ground but the boys were still enjoying the air in the mattress. I got up around 7:30 a.m. and headed into the house. Sophia was waking and Aubrie was walking around the house. I crawled into bed and prayed for sleep to come. Rachel got up and grabbed Sophia and brought her into bed. She stayed quiet for a little, but then started saying Cock A Doddle Do every two seconds trying to make me open my eyes. I got up and took her downstairs so that Rachel could hopefully get some more rest. I don't think that she did. I started to make breakfast as the kids played out in the tent. They really had a great time and I will do it again soon. I will put up the bigger tent next time so that we can all get in there. This will be good practice for Sophia for when we go camping as a family.
Breakfast went well. The kids all wanted Lucky Charms as I was pouring the pancake bater! They all had a bowl and then came back for pancakes. I love having a big breakfast with the family. It is nice to all be around each other to start the day. Sunday is usually the only day that we can do that since the other days we are occupied with school or sports. We made sure that we had plenty of time to get ready for church. Church started out ok until Sophia said, "oh my goodness! I need to potty!" I picked her up and ran to the bathroom only to find that she had already gone. She did not have a diaper on so I had to put her in the car and drive home. Once home I had to change her into a new outfit. I got back to church as they were passing the sacrament so Sophia and I hung out in the hall until it was over. She did well the rest of sacrament and the kids all took turns rubbing hands or scratching backs. I was once again able to get Ethan to fall asleep in my arms by rubbing his hands and scratching his back. He is such a sweet boy. He really needs at least 12 hours of sleep a day and finds ways to get it.
We got through church and then got back home. I wanted to end the week by making a nice dinner for the family. I sliced potatoes and cooked up mushrooms and then threw the steaks on the BBQ. Everything turned out well and we ate dinner outside on the patio. The kids liked the change of pace and like my mashed potatoes! I was glad that they turned out for once. After dinner we played outside in the tent and on the trampoline. Aubrie and Boston took turns practicing piano. We ended Sunday as we always do...watching America's Funiest Home Videos. We all love to watch people do silly things. It has become a tradition for our family. I hope that it never goes away! The kids all got ready for bed and we are now ready for another week. Tomorrow morning scripture study will be here before you know it! I am so grateful for my little family and for the amazing job that Rachel does with all of us. She is good and righteous and pushes us to do the best that we can. We may actually make it! Hopefully we will learn to pull our share of the load and not have her carry us the whole way!

Monday, January 4, 2010

Another Decade for the Pribyl Family!

I can't believe Christmas Break is over!! I really enjoyed Christmas Break. Though nap time was a bit tricky, and fitting in work outs, it was so relaxing and enjoyable!
Thursday we spent the day breaking down and putting away the Christmas stuff. Usually I'm sad to do it, but this year I was so ready to get it all down. I couldn't bare to take these down yet.
This is the first year I taped my Christmas cards on the wall. I love it! It's like I get to see my friends everyday! I spent the rest of the day working on the impossible 1000 piece puzzle, that I bought because I thought it looked easy. So much for that! Ben was very patient with me an my puzzle addiction. He doesn't like them, so he found other things to do. Ben had a great time with the kids, playing the new Super Mario game. He is a great Dad!
I made a nice dinner for New Years Eve, and we just chilled at home. We did stop by friends, who live close by, for a quick visit. It turned into a much longer one, when I got sucked into a puzzle they had started. After about an hour, Ben finally had to pull me out of there! When we got home, we put Sophia down and let the 3 oldest stay up till Midnight to watch the ball drop. They thought it was cool, even though they had been staying up that late almost every night during this break anyway.
Friday we went to Chuckee Cheese, but not until we finally finished the puzzle. Here it is. Doesn't look hard, does it? Aubrie and my Dad would disagree!
Saturday we ran errands, and Aubrie and I went shopping for decorations for our Valentines tree. We decided to try something new this year. We are going to leave our tree up and make it our Holiday Tree. We'll see how much we like it come summer. So far I'm LOVING it!

Saturday night we hung out and did another 300 piece puzzle and frosted sugar cookies.
I watched Beaches with the kids (a few parts edited). Aubrie liked it the most! I was like clockwork, crying at the same parts. Boston was making fun of me. Sounds typical, huh?
Yesterday was our new time slot at church, 1-4. It was nice. We spent the morning watching family and church videos. Sophia was sick, so I had to stay home. It worked out well. I was able to get Sunday Stations ready, read some of the Ensign, and have dinner on the table by the time they walked in the door.
I can't believe this is another Decade for Ben and I. I remember looking at my Brother's calendar, when Ben and I were newly married, and seeing their 10 year anniversary on their calendar. I remember thinking, "Wow! They have been married forever!" We have surpassed that, and boy did it go fast! I'm looking forward to what this new year will hold for our family! We have experienced a lot of changes, and know that all of them have been for our growth and learning. A new year is always a great time to glance back at things you want to change, hold on to the good, and then press forward towards the best. Watching the family videos yesterday made me realize how very lucky I am, and how quickly that time really goes. I recently found out that a old friend of mine just got married, for the first time, in his early 40's. That got me in a reflective mood. It made me realize how many years of love, joy, and blessings have been poured out upon me. What an amazing life we have made together. All the memories, and experiences we have journeyed together. I think that's another reason why I like having those Christmas cards on my wall. The family and friends up there, remind me of different times and experiences I have shared with Ben and the kids! How lucky I am to have found my sweetheart early in life, and have had the opportunity to have a big family. I can't imagine anything else! Here is to appreciating what you have, and making the most of it every day!