Tuesday, January 19, 2010

So much for my Calendar!

OK...this weekend I was not a candidate for the "Mother of the Week" award and ate some humble pie. While I often pride myself on being organized and having everything on my calendar, I definitely messed up and my kids weren't happy about it. Saturday we spent the morning just hanging out and watching A Walk To Remember ( a great movie if you haven't seen it). Then we had a big breakfast, did our chores, and then got ready for our soccer games that started at 11:15. As we drove up to the soccer fields. we saw Aubrie's team playing. We were there 20 minutes early! I had no clue what was going on, but let Aubrie out as we parked. Once we parked and walked up to the fields, there was Aubrie, crying and saying that the game was almost over. Somehow I messed up, both of their games. So here were with two kids all dressed and excited to play and we had to just turn around and go back home. I thought I was so scheduled and organized. So much for that! Luckily the kids got over it fast! When I was at the temple Friday and was asking for more humility, I didn't' realize that he was going to work so fast! LOL Actually, that's not what I was asking for, but everyone can definitely use some humble pie once in awhile!
Saturday night Ben spent in the tent with the three older kids. He only lasted till 1:00, when the air mattress deflated and left him on the cold ground. He pulled all the kids out, and put them in their beds, while I was fast asleep upstairs. I had gone to bed extra early. I have been feeling very tired this past week. I have these spells every couple of months. They are hard on me, because I like to keep busy, but they also make me appreciate my heath when I have it!
Ben finally took the tent down yesterday, when it started raining. It was a sad day for Sophia. She loved going out to the "temple" (that's what she called) and play! Ben is such a great Dad for doing such fun things for the kids.
Here are some pictures I haven't gotten around to posting.
My Dad's last day here:( How I miss him! We had such a great time! He is so great at giving advice in such a loving manner. He also has treated me like an equal, never making me feel like my thoughts and feelings were inferior to his. He has always been there to support me and love me. Never has he made me feel like I was a disappointment to him. He has held me up on a pedestal, and I attribute a lot of my self image and self esteem to him always building me up. I think because of that, I have never wanted to let him down. Talk about good psychological parenting!
Last week we had 80's exercise night for mutual. Funny thing, is that I raided Aubrie's closet to get stuff. I never thought in a million years that my daughter would be wearing fluorescent, and stretch pants, but she is...and I LOVE it! While many people say the 80's were atrocious, I can not agree. I LOVE the 80's! While I personally wouldn't wear most of that stuff, it looks so cute on the little one's.

Brother play time! Had to take a picture so I could remember that they do have moments of playing so well together! (BTW, the book on the table is one of my new favorites for the kids!)

More creations by Ethan!
Guess he was jealous of all the snow Flagstaff was getting!
Glad the Jenga is getting used!

Bedding Worth Working For

While I'm often guilty of giving my children too much, sometimes I hold back dying desires to spoil, spoil, spoil, and make then earn things for themselves. Last year Aubrie spent countless hours doing laundry, chores, etc, and saving every dime of her allowance to earn enough money for a DS. Now this is what she is working hard for. Last week we were walking in Target and she found this bedding. She pleaded and begged, but I told her she would have to buy it herself. I told her her bedding was in perfect condition and it would not be smart for Mom and Dad to spend our money on something that wasn't needed. She complained that she never picked out her current bedding and that is was to juvenile for her. (It was a valid argument since she had no say in her room, but she wasn't complaining either when I got it all). None the less, I told her she would have to earn money if she wanted it. Since then, that's all she has been thinking about. She keeps looking at it online, making sure it's still there. In the meantime, she has had two lemonade stands to earn money. Saturday she sat out for 2 1/2 hours (as soon as she got home from soccer) and she earned 36 dollars. I was quite surprised that she had earned so much! That was after paying us for the lemonade and cups and giving a dollar to Ethan. Monday wasn't as successful. It was rainy and there wasn't as much traffic. I was proud of her that she didn't throw in the towel immediately. After splitting it with Ethan, she ended up with 2 dollars. Her response when I said sorry it didn't work out so well.. "That's OK, something is better than nothing". She is looking forward to another successful Saturday.

Here is my little secret. We already have purchased her bedding. We are keeping it hidden, so when she gets the money we will already have it for her! There has been several days that I have wanted to take it out of Ben's trunk and put it on her bed, and surprise her. I start rationalizing and saying, "she had earned so much already", or "she deserves it because she is doing so well at staying on top of her grades and all her other responsibilities", etc, etc. I then come to my senses, remembering that this experience is good for her, and will help her when she is older.
This makes me think of our Heavenly Father. I'm sure he wants to give us everything we want because he loves us and loves to see us happy. But he is wise and realizes that somethings we must wait for, because it teaches us patience, and we will also appreciate things more that we work hard for. Now if I can only remember that when I'm praying to him saying, "Why can't I have this now!" LOL
Here is to my sweet daughter who will remember when she worked hard for her bedding each time she gets in it, and a Mother who will learn that teaching your child the value of hard work is more rewarding than giving them everything!

Free time= Quality time

Last week I spent organizing and cleaning. I never got out of my work out clothes the beginning of the week. After the Holiday's, it always seems like the first weeks I spend getting the house back in order. Then, once that's accomplished, I walk around feeling like I have forgotten to do something. It's because I have been so used to running around with my head cut off October thru the New Years. It's a weird feeling to have a list that isn't as full with "must-do's" as there is "would--like -to-do's". While I often complain when I have so much going on, I think in reality I do better with it. Now, what will I do with my few months of down time? Work on my goals for this year!

One of my goals is to spend more of my days giving one on one time with Sophia. So far it's included trips to the park, library, reading books, and doing Playdoh. I really am enjoying this time with her, and am beginning to appreciate her more and more each day. She is such a sweet little girl. While I do admit she is strong headed as a bull, she has a soft center. She actually reminds me so much of Boston. Lately one her cutest things include, insisting on reading books on her own. She likes me to be there with her, but she won't let me read them to her. If she doesn't already have them memorized she will make something up. They always start with "One time....". One morning, during scripture study, she started "fake reading" It started with "One time...." and then she started making stuff up about Jesus and Heavenly Father as she looked at the Book of Mormon upside down! When it came to her in the circle, we would just let her fake read, and then the next person would pick up where we left off. Another thing that is so cute about her, is her manners. Though she is strongly opinionated, she is always sure to say her yes pleases and thank yous! What a sweetheart! Each new thing we do together helps me appreciate how lucky I am to have her all to myself, for such a long period each day. I've realized that my time with her will be short, and that there will always be time, later, spent out with friends, running meaningless errands, or working on projects that just don't matter. These little spirits are on loan to me for just a short time and she is my last!

One of my other goals is to make more time at bedtime. While I have always been good at reading, praying, back scratching, and singing my original good night song with each kid, I always wanted to get through it all as fast as possible. I recently have slowed things down a bit, and learned to be silly and have fun with the kids at bedtime. Even a few extra minutes hugging on a kid, or hearing more about their day is worth much more than a few minutes of TV, or on the computer.
Another goal of both Ben and I, is to make one on one time with each kid. While its often hard to do that amongst crazy schedules, Ben and I are making a more concentrated effort. We decided to implement "Night's Up"! This is where one of the kids gets to stay up an extra hour with Mom and Dad doing something fun. Last week Boston picked playing Super Mario with Ben and I. Ethan did the same, after requesting that his night up could be with the whole family watching a movie! Aubrie's was spent having dinner at AH-SO, with Ben, after her dance class. I can already tell how much these "nights-up" mean to them, and wish we would have started them earlier.
So here's to a year with more quality time with the kiddos! I can already see the difference it is making!